Life on the Pharm

What’d it be like livin’ off the pharm?

Ball-bustin’ bronco boots’d be walkin’

Boots’d be walking, they’d be walkin’ strong

Till the crow flew by and landed

On a brittle branch

A bit down the way.

Holdn’ on tightn’ watchin’.

Watchin’ me a’scootin’

With its birds-eye view.

That’s what that little bird’d do.


Pharm-less too long, got to git back.

Sunk in cheeks, leg muscles done went weak

C’mon blue-black crow bird

C’mon’n show me back the way,

I need t’go, ‘cause

If’n I ain’t got the pharm,

My boot scootin’ won’t git me too far

Any old way.


Crow bird fly away, lead the wayn’

I’ll follow ya back.

Jus’ stop ever so offin’

Along your way.

Jus’ stop along your way-

‘N make sure the pharm hasn’t already gotten t’me,

‘N stopped my boots from ‘a scootin’

Stopped my sore legs a movin’.



Could be deadn’ my own boot scootn’ tracks today.

The pharm’d git me, if the crow bird

Just flew away. Showed me tho-

My way back, then flew right away.

Saved me from bein’

A vultures, special of the day.

‘Tho the meal wouldn’tve been fillin’

Skin’n bones’d be all there was to be on dat plate.


Made it back t’ da pharm.

Swallowed um up’n pulled off my

Boots, theyd’ not git me too far-

Them there boots, they

Wouldn’t git me too far any ‘ol way.

I reckon, the pharm’s where I’ll have to stay

From now, till Some Great Vacation

Flies me away.

Health and Nutrition - Reboot Re-Live

Reboot Day Five

While enjoying my hot tea last night, I fell asleep on the sofa, hence, I did not vlog yesterday.

I am no orator, but here is my vlog for today.

For any of the recipes I’ve mentioned, visit rebootwithjoe.com for specifics.

By the way: I have not given upon my writings, they are an important and essential part of who I am. I am putting it all on hold while I take my sickly body and make it healthy again. I do seem to find a half an hour here, and fifteen minutes there to write, but most of my energy is going into the reboot for now.

Off to the farmers market-GOOD DAY FRIENDS!!!


Bye-Bye Boyhood (Part Eleven)

That weekend I hung out with a group of friends from school, including Karah. I haven’t told you much about her yet. She would play an important role in my life several years down the road, but not yet. Now, she was just some joe schmoe girlfriend. There was a time when I was in love with her, or I thought I was, anyway. Such was the case during these times. In all actuality, though, I knew a woman had nothing to offer my innermost desire. A burning fire that was the real ‘me’; a person I hadn’t even met yet.

Karah wasn’t all that pretty, but had a great smile and had a lot of friends. She loved to introduce me to all of them as her “Bad Boy” boyfriend. Girls think it’s sexy if you’re a bad boy, but really, I wasn’t. Her chin and her nose were both the same length, giving her face a half moon-look about it. Her hair was blond and styled in an off-beat new wave sort of a way.

She’s the one who brought me dancing at a club for the first time. Before then, I’d only danced on the living room floor with my mother. She also taught me how to dress all new wave and shit; and turned me on to some great music back then, like The Cure, Souixsie and the Banchees, Devo and a bunch of other amazing bands of the time.

The group that night, also included Bert, who was a cute Greek guy and came from a very strict family. His strict family life didn’t include beatings, so he was luckier that he thought. It did cause him to walk around with a big chip on his shoulders though, which added to his sexiness in a way. He’s the one who turned me onto New Order. He listened to them constantly. These days, any time I hear Blue Monday, or some other song by them, I think of him.

Of course, I was completely in the closet with this group of guys and could never hint that I was attracted to them, or anything. I could get beat up, you know?  They were those kind of guys. It’s funny to think that they thought that I was one of those type of guys too. It is probably more common that you think that gay guys in the closet act as if they hate gays. As a cover, you know? Wonder how many of those tough guys are takin’ it where the sun doesn’t shine these days?

Another friend I went with that night was Kyle. Kyle was a goody-two-shoes, who, I guess, just hung out with us, because no one else would hang out with him. He was pretty cool though. His family had boo-koo money and he was the fat wallet of the evening. He was so, just about every time we hung out. I really liked him though. He was a little goofy, but was also thoughtful and kind. I think the other guys were just using him, maybe I was too, in a way, but I genuinely liked him. During those days, if I were to tell anyone that I was gay, it would have been him. At that point, though, it was not the right time for that.

Orrie, was a skateboarder and a BMX bike rider. He thought he was a punk, but I knew better. He was what the punks back in New Orleans called a ‘poser’. He was also very cute and always had some pretty girl all goo-goo-ga-ga over him. His hair was shaved in the back and long on the top. Better known as a bowl-cut, but it was cool, really. Not a ‘my mother cut my hair’ bowl-cut at all. It would become a staple haircut for guys back then, but at that time, he rocked it alone. He was always trying to get us to do some sort of drug. This night would be no different, that’s for sure.